Sister Table Talk

Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me. This idiom has been quoted by many children to indicate name calling or words will never hurt them. Proverbs 18:21 states, Death and life are in the power of the tongue: and they that love it shall eat the fruit thereof. So, words can hurt or empower! How will you use your use your tongue today? Will you speak life or death into the lives of others? What will you speak into yourself? If you choose death, why bother speaking?

When my sisters are weak, I become their strength. When my sisters are blind, I become their eyes so they can see. When my sisters cannot hear, I become their ears to help them listen. When my sisters are perplexed, I become their intuition for certainty. When my sisters are weeping, I become element that wipes their weeping eyes. When my sisters are sorrowful, I become their laughter. When my sisters are experiencing pain, I become their healer. When society puts my sisters down, I lift them up with honor and praise. When my sisters reveal their human frailties, I become their covering. When my sister's husbands or male companions approach me for temporary pleasure, I become my sister's compass to lead their loved ones back home. I’m my sister’s keeper.

At least I have a job – but it’s not rewarding, fulfilling, or impactful. At least I have a man – even though he’s married with children. At least I know dynamic, elitist people - but don’t have authentic connections. At least I go to church – but don’t have a spiritual connection to God. At least I’m liked – but you yearn for unconditional love and encouragement. At least I have a GED – but was born with potential beyond a general education. Energy exhausted striving for the least is a fast race to the bottom. If you’re going to run, strive for the top (i.e., your best). No one spends time practicing to enter a race with the intention to lose or end at the bottom.

According to Target Market News 16th annual report Buying Power of Black America , the expenditures of Blacks rose to $507 billion dollars. The top five expenditures were: Housing $203.8 billion Food $65.2 billion Cars/Trucks $29.1 billion Clothing $29.3 billion Health Care $23.6 billion Who or what is being empowered as a result of this Black Buying Power ? Is the employment gap among Blacks closing? Are the increasing numbers of disparities within the Black Community decreasing? Is the growing trend of poverty amongst low-income, women-led families being addressed? Is this buying power restoring or strengthening the Black family unit - a foundation in society? It appears the Buying Power of Blacks is generating economic stability and wealth outside of their communities. Yep! It's helping other Ethnic groups establish businesses in socially and economically disadvantaged communities (i.e., underserved Black Communities) for members of their group. And, this buying powe

Do you pray and ask God to stop your car as you approach a stop sign or red light? We may pray if our brakes feel like they're going out. Why do we plead the blood and rebuke the Devil when the doctor tells us, our smoking will lead to lung cancer, our drinking can lead to cirrhosis of the liver, or our sexual activities will lead to a sexually transmitted disease. What do you believe is the driving force behind our payment of our own death when God sent Jesus Christ to give us life? Can the Devil or our sin nature simply be the blame? When are we going to take responsibility for our choices? The next time we're diagnosed with some type of ailment, instead of rebuking the Devil and pleading the Blood of Jesus on the symptom, plead the Blood of Jesus Christ on the force that contributes to our emotional, mental, and physical death.

Horn Tooting is the normalcy in many business environments. But when and how loud should we toot our horns? When we’ve closed the deal on a sale? Toot! When we’ve written a book? Toot! When we’ve made our first million? Toot! Appeared on TV or radio? Toot! When we’ve been embraced by an elite or exclusive group? Toot! Received a degree from an Ivy League college? Toot! Best Business of the Year Award recipient? Toot! Luke 14:11 states, For whosoever exalteth himself shall be abased; and he that humbled himself shall be exalted . If our clients aren’t tooting our horns, is our horn tooting in vain? Who's tooting yours?

Everything we do in life involves choices. Everyday that God gives us the gift of life, we can decide how to live life. We can choose to be productive or unproductive; get out of or stay in bed; take Metro or drive to work; cook or eat out, wear red instead of blue; send our children to public or private school; eat beef or pork; eat wheat or white bread; drink tap or distilled water; stay single or get married; stay married or get a divorce; choose a new rewarding career, or remain miserable in a monotonous dead end job; serve God or not serve God; pray or not pray, show and give love or show and give hate; be an agnostic, humanist, or monotheistic; become a Muslim, Jehovah’s Witness, or Christian; attend a Baptist, African Methodist Episcopal, Non-Denominational, or a Holiness church; live or die. Hmm, choices, choices, choices!!! Life is full of so many choices. The choices we make while living on this earth, can result in life’s great gain or destruction. Our eternal destiny is

Anger is a colorless emotion that has become a universal definition of today's Black Woman . Why are Black Women angry? Are they tired of the negative connotations associated with their identity? Did they grow up without an earthly father that never confirmed their God-given beauty when society didn’t embrace their darker hue? Are they tired of playing the role of mother and father when they only have the capacity to play one? Are they tired of lifting up others, while concurrently being torn down? Are they tired of living pretentiously, and have forgotten how to be authentic? Are they living in bondage and don’t know how to break free? Did their search for love, affection, and acceptance lead them into the arms of Mr. Wrong? Did their career pursuits bring them external wealth, while leaving their spirits depleted? Whew! There are countless reasons for women to be angry, but none can justify sinning as a result of them. Ephesians 4:26 states, Be angry, and do not si

Prayer – Spiritual guidance from God to ensure your work will bring glory and honor to Him Passion – The enthusiasm to serve others through your business Purpose – Clear business vision, existence, and desired outcomes Perseverance – Determination to achieve success regardless of obstacles or setbacks Patience – Ability to deal with difficult people and tasks Partnership – Business relationships that strengthens your capacity to better serve your clients Publicity – Life-changing services and/or products that create excitement about your business Power – The power of God when you run out of your might to succeed Performance – Criteria to evaluate and measure the effectiveness and impact of your work Purity – Absence of activities and/or people that can taint your business existence or expansion

Okay, it’s been weeks, months, maybe a few years and you still haven’t found a J.O.B. If your job search strategy has primarily been behind a computer pushing emails and electronic resumes, your resumes are probably being added to thousands of job seekers in a virtual recruitment center being daily purged by the delete button. Which means your livelihood is somewhat in the hands of a virtual recruiter with the power to move your resume forward or prevent it from reaching your desired destination – the decision maker who can hire you. Let’s face it, unemployment can stink, but it can also be a sweet aroma when you decide to use this experience as fuel to take charge of your life in spite of the economy! You’ve heard the saying If It’s Going to Be, It’s up to Me. That’s right; it’s going to be up to you to create your own path to financial freedom. Not the government, politicians, Mama, Daddy, Pookie – You! Here are a few suggestions to make it happen: Develop a winning attitud

Emotional Intelligence is linked to an ability to identify, assess, and control emotions. Depending on a woman’s estrogen level or her season of life, controlling her emotions can be a challenge – even in the workplace. Here are some tips to strengthen your intelligence: Get Real With Yourself - Identify and deal with the source of negative emotions because nothing positive derives from them. Suppressing or camouflaging these emotions with shopping, smoking, or eating are temporary coping mechanisms that can lead to other challenges. Know Your Role – Be clear on your purpose for working; the benefits and impact your contributions have on your employer’s bottom-line, and how your role coincides with their mission and core values. Don’t React, Get the Facts – There are many women reacting to events based on their emotions instead of facts. Feelings should never be used as a deciding factor in the workplace because they aren’t tangible and cannot be validated. Define Your Outc

After spending nine relentless months looking for work at a local one-stop career center, an unemployed single mother regained hope to find employment when she learned how to build a career in customer-service from the results of a complimentary MAPP assessment provided by The SOFEI Group, Inc. Filled with passion to provide great customer-service to her next prospective employer, this single mother landed nine interviews within nine weeks of attending The SOFEI Group's Microsoft Office Specialist certification training program. Her hope was restored and momentum to find employment soared, but something was preventing her from getting hired - her forgiveness for being unemployed! This breakthrough came when a career development facilitator of The SOFEI Group looked her square in the eyes and said, “Your smile isn’t in harmony with the way you really feel about yourself, and maybe this spirit is resonating during your interviews - preventing you from getting hired.” Tears s

Focus on the person God wants you to be, not the person you used to be. Here’s how: Forgive yourself of your past mistakes and use them as stepping stones to your true identity and potential. ( Isaiah 43:18 ) Feed your inner being with God’s word, positive thoughts, and positive self-talk. ( Philippians 4:8 ) Focus only on your potential and not your limitations. ( Isaiah 43:7 ) Do not measure your life against the accomplishments of others. ( I Samuel 16:7 ) Govern your life according to God’s plan; not opinions. (Jeremiah 29:11-13 )

Discovering and crafting your gift and sharing it passionately with greatness! In our How to Create a Great Career workshop, we teach people how to build great careers from their innate qualities; not from skills they’ve learned to make a living, but from their God-given gifts to make a life. During the workshop, we demonstrate how people like Serena and Venus Williams, Tiger Woods, and Michael Jordan were able to get corporate sponsorships because of their ‘greatness’ in their respective sports, not because they had good marketing skills to promote Nike, Hanes, or Buick. God created us to succeed so others can experience Him through our work. And, He cannot accomplish this through people that know how to wear or drive success; but through people that are willing and spiritually fit to do the work He has called us to do. Success is a divine right. Don’t allow the definitions or opinions of others hold yours hostage.

Working hard but your career is going nowhere fast? Are you unemployed and on the fence to find familiar work to pay bills or need to start new because your old job is obsolete? If you answered yes to either question, you can redirect your efforts and move your career in the right direction. Here’s how: Evaluate the underlying cause of being stuck in your career. Do you believe this is the only work you're qualified to do? Jobs are scarce so you're thankful for what you have and you've decided to stay where you are. You've worked in this field and don't know what else to do. You believe you're too old to start a new career. Get in the driver seat; take your career off ‘auto cruise’ and determine where you want to take it Resolve negative emotions associated with unemployment Assess your skills and determine who can benefit from them. List your contributions and the impacts. Create a career plan (inclusive of a personal mission statement and goals) to

Online training is helping millions of people all over the world get their long-awaited undergraduate or graduate degrees, launch and expand businesses, and gain skills to advance their careers. Then there are millions that haven’t taken advantage of this learning trend because of their preference of in-person training – concluding this training method is more legitimate when you can touch and feel your instructor or facilitator than hearing or watching using online media. The SOFEI Group, Inc. has become perplexed of the apprehension towards online learning from people who have never tried it. And, as a training provider, we believe training is as legitimate of the trainees’ learning and development needs. Here’s our take on the benefits of online learning: It’s a cost savings for trainees and the environment (e.g., less paper trail associated with traditional training methods) It’s flexible and great for working parents with children It’s an egalitarian way to acquire skills an

Tavis Smiley - author, talk and radio host and Dr. Cornel West - author, activist, speaker and Princeton University Professor launched a poverty tour to bring a voice and conscience to the growing trend of American poverty. Their work is commendable; however, isn't it time for communities (especially the Black) to unify resources to become self-sustaining and less reliant on the government for their livelihood? American poverty as defined by the Census Bureau looks rich compared to impoverished countries. Is it shameful for Americans to be classified as poor in a country replete with resources? Absolutely! But when immigrants come to this country with different barriers (language being one of them) and succeed, why can't members of the African American communities do likewise? The current budget cuts aren't pretty, and the cuts are creating deeper wounds. Should the wounded go to the President and Congress, wave bloody bandages to make them stop the bleeding? O

Pushed into your Purpose was the dynamic message delivered by Ms. Wanda Childs – speaker, author, and founder of Blessed 24:7 during our second annual First Lady Luncheon on Thursday, May 12 at the Oxon Hill Manor Historic Mansion. As she spoke, my eyes welled with tears as I reminisced on my journey from a corporate employee to Chief Empowerment Officer of The SOFEI Group, Inc. In 2001, I was pushed into my purpose when I was laid off while four months pregnant with my first child. I remember going on interviews hiding my pregnancy hoping to land another job; however, this approach became quite stressful because I was trying to secure work based on fear and deceit instead of skills and pride of becoming a new mother. I never understood why motherhood was viewed by some employers as a burden on their bottom-line. This experience is one of the reasons why I decided to heed to the call to build an organization to empower women struggling to reclaim their rightful place in thei

Contributors! Yes, employers are looking for people to join their business as a contributor, a problem solver, not a leech. Employers are not hiring to simply increase their payroll. They’re more likely hiring to address business needs or challenges. What about you? Are you selling your skills to get a job to pay the bills? Or, are you selling your skills to make a business contribution? If your job search strategy is simply to get a job to pay bills, you need to change your job search approach. Here’s how: Find your niche (everyone is great at something) Change your self- talk ( there aren’t any jobs, nobody’s hiring ) Change your Circle of Influence (surround yourself around problem-solvers) Conduct research to learn about your prospective employer's business trend(s) and industry (e.g., find out how they make money, the dynamics and demographics of their customers) Discover and decide your contributions and benefits you want to make for your prospective employer and create a “

There are numerous women and girls that empower others to dominate their lives. Teenage girls give up their virginity to boys that don't understand their value or worth – in search of love and affection. Adult women put their dreams and aspirations on a 20-year hold to take care of their family - ending up broke or homeless due to divorce. Or, single mothers that expand their family when a large source of their household income is at the expense of public assistance or a social service agency. The list goes on and on and on..... For years, The SOFEI Group (formerly known as Virtuous Enterprises, Inc.) has provided services to enrich the quality of lives of women and girls. And, during these years, I've discovered programs and services are as effective as the people that want to invest in themselves to change the direction of their lives. Change starts within! This is where the power starts too - within the core of our being. For Women’s History Month , I’m calling women to recl